Random Conversations

A colleague approached me the other day. We were each doing separate business in the washroom, but our paths intersected at the hand dryers. Yes. Thankfully not before.

Colleague: "So, Shawn did you unpack your stuff?"

I stare blankly, blinking, thinking that perhaps I could not clearly hear what he said over the drone of the hand dryers.

"Sorry, what was that?" I asked.

Colleague: "Did you unpack your staff."

Shawn: "My stuff? What stuff?"

Colleague: "Your things when you moved."

Shawn: "When I moved?" I replied, completely confused. "My office? My office has been in the same place for four years."

Colleague: "No. Your place. You said you had stuff to unpack."

Shawn: "My place?" I replied, still confused. "You mean my condo?"

Colleague: "Yes, your condo."

Shawn: "Okay, my condo. I still don't know what stuff you are talking about."

Colleague: "You said you had a lot of stuff to go through. And a lot of books to pack."

I stare at him for a moment as it dawns on me that he is referring to a conversation I had with him three years ago.

Shawn: "Uh, yeah. I moved close to three years ago. Not only did I finish packing but I also finished unpacking."

I filled the awkward silence with a brief story about the one box of junk in the back of a closet I kept for a rainy day. I then hurried away before he could ask me about some other random event in my life.

Still a little confused by the line of questioning, I was tempted to go back to ask him if he remembers seeing me on a near weekly basis over the last couple years. If this was a concern for him he could have brought it up sooner. Was this his attempt at small talk? Doesn't small talk usually revolve around current events.

The next conversation with him could go something like this.
Colleague: "Did you here about The Edmund Fitzgerald? Sucks."

If not already done, we must impose a statute of limitations on old conversations. We would simply tell the other person, "That topic is prescribed." Or if the existing limitations were lifted I wish someone would tell me. I will have to answer a lot of "Why didn't you call me?" questions from the last few years.

Complete Idiot's Guide...

Why Colleagues are Colleagues and Friends are Friends

Colleague / Friend: "Shawn, Let's grab a beer after work."

Shawn: "Okay."

Two hours later...

Colleague / Friend: "Shawn, I'm going next door for a beer or two. See you there?"

Shawn: "Sure. You'll be there for a couple hours?"

Colleague / Friend: "Definitely."

Shawn: "See you there."

Fifteen minutes later, Shawn meets colleague at bar and orders a pint.

Four minutes later...

Colleague / Former Friend: "Well, I've got to go, see you Monday."

Shawn: " ! "

A man walks into a bar and says...

A man walks into a bar and says, "Give me a beer before problems start!"

Again, the man orders a beer again saying, "Give me a beer before problems start!"

The bartender looks confused. This goes on for a while, and after the fifth beer the bartender is totally confused and asks the man "When are you going to pay for these beers?"

The man answers, "Now the problems start!"

I've been away for a while. Not out of town away but away from writing. I had seven stories started and no ability to complete any of them. A few days away does a wonder of good. Not to mention the triple shot cafe latte I had at Starbucks about an hour ago. My brain is fired up. Let's see if I can sit still long enough to compose this post.

I usually drive my car to work but decided to take the metro the other day. By subway it takes me just short of an hour to get to the office. By car, about 40 minutes. I have done the calculations and weighed the benefits of car travel versus public transit.

In terms of cost on a monthly basis I would save money with public transportation. Not a lot, but some. A $70 pass compared to $50 for parking at work and the price of gasoline covering about 35 kilometres a day.

I suppose the greatest benefit would be to the environment. But at a loss of 30 minutes of my time each day, I would have to consider it a little more.

Now the reason I took the metro was because I was heading downtown with my colleagues for a team building event. Parking downtown ain't cheap, and since the team building event was taking place in a bar I figured it best if the car stayed home.

Six pints and some tequila proved me right.

Starting off in the morning I pictured a great story about the violence or crime I witnessed on the metro. Luckily for me, but unlucky for the story, I did not witness a crime. It is Montreal after all, and while not crime free, by North American standards, it remains pretty safe.

The best story I could muster, developed on the trek back. Sitting with three of my colleagues in the metro car, I started making fun of them for getting on the train heading in the wrong direction. As it turned out, I was the one heading in the wrong direction. It's not as bad as it sounds. Or maybe it is. I only went one stop out of my way.