As I flipped TV channels this morning while drinking my coffee I grew nostalgic over the long gone television shows of my youth. Saturday morning TV has changed drastically. What happened to Saturday morning cartoons and kids' shows? One show that stands out in my mind is The Hudson Brothers Razzle Dazzle Show.
The Razzle Dazzle Show aired from 1974 to 1975 and although it was only on for one year. was a staple of Saturday morning viewing. An eclectic, zany and colourful show, Razzle Dazzle was filled with comedy sketches and musical performances. And don't forget Rod Hull and Emu, and The Bear. And of course Bill, Mark and Brett Hudson.
I was in the Chapters bookstore a few days back and ran into my cousin. He introduced me to Go the F**K To Sleep by Adam Mansbach. The book can best be described as a children's story for the parent. The sweetly drawn art work is typical of any children's storybook. The profanity laced prose is what makes Mansbach's book stand out. Of course, I immediately wanted to buy the book but my good old cousin was holding the store's last copy. Here is the awesome audio of Samuel L. Jackson with the accompanying video. In the introduction Jackson says, his own experiences proved that reading stories to put kids to sleep does not work. Jackson said he used to say "go the fuck to sleep" to his own daughter growing up.
While Jackson is perfect in style and voice I started thinking about who else could pull it off. What about Dennis Leary? How about Christopher Walken? He didn't make a recording himself - here is the awesome Kevin Pollack from his show Kevin Pollack's Chat Show impersonating Walken doing the same read.
When I found out it was Wayne Gretzky's birthday yesterday I didn't think much of it. I read a couple paragraphs over my morning coffee and went on with my day. It didn't cross my mind again until my drive home from work listening to the Team 990 all sports radio station. Mitch Melnick had a couple guests speaking about their experiences covering the Gretzky era of the NHL. The interview started triggering my very own memories of The Great One.
Gretzky was the most dominant hockey player, for the longest period of time. This made him the greatest player ever. My biggest memory of The Great One is not about what he did on the ice but what he did off the ice and goes back to when he was first starting out.
Gretzky had built a reputation for himself in his first year in the WHA. In the NHL he became the legend that his is today. 1981 marked the third year in professional hockey for the 20 year old and with his name finally becoming one of renown, his second career as a spokesman was launched. As an impressionable kid in 1981 I had heard of Gretzky, heard everyone talking about him and had seen him play hockey on TV. And then I saw his TV ad for GWG Scrubbies jeans.
Wayne Gretzky wears GWG Scrubbies? Gretzky is cool. I need a pair of GWG Scrubbies. As the tag line said, GWG Scrubbies fit wear it counts. Within moments of seeing the ad I ran upstairs and told my mom that I wanted GWG Scrubbies. I needed GWG Scrubbies. She questioned why GWG all of a sudden? I told her that I heard that they were good jeans and popular. I was surprised as all hell when my mom bought me a pair.
So, it was back to school and after a couple months of wondering why I was the only one wearing GWG Scrubbies it suddenly dawned on me, GWG Scrubbies aren't cool. And Gretzky? Not so much either. And I was stuck with a pair of GWGs. Who cares if they fit where it counts?! And to make matters worse, I didn't grow much that year and was stuck with the same pair for both semesters.
More time passed and it hit me that good old Wayne was a geek. A great athlete but a geek. 1982 brought the Mats Naslund era to Montreal and Gretzky commercials no longer spoke to me. What's more the only local hockey related ads on TV starred the long retired Maurice Richard. And I wasn't in the market for Grecian Formula. I was able to recognize that Gretzky was a great talent but it was a little overkill. And, above all, he didn't play for Montreal.
Later, much later, my opinion of Gretzky changed again. When the news spread of him dating, and then later marrying Janet Jones, hmm... maybe he was cool. But that's still no excuse for making me buy GWG Scrubbies.
I received the long expected invitation this week. The high school reunion. Twenty five years. Twenty five years! TWENTY FIVE YEARS! I am having trouble believing it. And I also realize it will be difficult to hide my age after revealing that I graduated 25 years ago.
I went to the 20 year reunion. I was curious and I had to go. I did not renew any old friendships. It was fun. I drank. I also remembered why I cut ties with everyone.
Do I go again? Do I care? The first time I did not know what to expect. Now, I do.
I was a 16 year old when I graduated in 86. The 80s were an eclectic mix. The school was made up of so many social and cultural cliques. Punkers, mods, rockers, geeks, jocks, JAPS, Greeks. I wanted to see all the girls I was crushing on 20 years before. I wanted to see the guys I played basketball with. I wanted to see what happens to punkers when they grow up. A Mohawk with a receding hair line? Safety pins in their jeans bent and corroded from wear and tear?
I had this thought that the girls I was crushing on, the girls that came up to my shoulder in high school, now weigh more than I do, are taller than me, and lost more hair than I did.
I was curious to see the bball players.
How did the tall lean athletes get short and fat?
How can people from 25 years ago have such an impact on our lives today? More time has passed since graduation then the time we actually knew each other.
Fat people got skinny, skinny people got fat.
Do I look different? Changed? Sure. Do I care what people think of me? Hell no.
We know looks change. We forget that people change. I don’t mean just their looks. Are you not a different person now than 20 years ago?
Some old personality traits start coming out though. One old friend asked me if I was married. I told him no, not yet. He then made some derogatory comments towards my sexuality.
5 Years later I find out my tie was crooked.
I reminded him that I used to date his wife. The conversation ended there. But you see, I have matured. And here is proof. In the old days, I would have said, "I used to date your wife, and I still can any time I want to.”
Oddly enough, some of my favorite people, are those that I became friends with right after high school. We went to the same high school but as fate would have it, we became friends later. A couple of them even write a blog. Do I go to a class reunion to hang out with a handful of people and ignore another 100? Is it worth it? $100, open bar, food, music. Can I drink $100 worth of alcohol? Hell yeah. Do I want to with these people?
I don't have a moral, or a punchline to end with. Over the next month or two I will speak to friends. I will find out who is going. I am curious how many people go to their high school reunion. Does the class reunion mean that much to everyone? Does the reunion bring back good or bad memories?
Sunday was the big family outing. My brother's son and daughter performed in their school play this weekend. They are 8 and 7 years old. It is a big musical production at their school, 40 kids and 10 or so parents. Even my brother was in it, acting and singing and even dancing. He is the musical one in the family. Notice I didn't say talented one, just the musical one. I am almost too excited to finish typing this because I cant wait to send him the update to read my blog.
Perhaps it is not fair to compare the kids to Shakespeare in the Park but I cannot help but to judge this elementary school performance and compare it to any number of shows I have seen. Not that I have seen too many musicals but, I compare the performances to any adult performance and, to tell you the truth these eight year olds need more seasoning.
Let's put things in perspective. If an eight year old serves you lunch and it tastes terrible, you do not say, 'Oh, okay, they are kids, it's not supposed to taste like real food.' You think, this sucks, and you say , 'Thank you very much for the eggs, but next time you should use less blue crayon.'
You can watch the stage play of Les Miserables and be terribly impressed. And then watch some kids sing Master of the House, recognizing that they are kids say wow, that's so nice. But really, they suck.
The kids show was awesome - for kids. They put in a lot of work. The staff that trained and coached them were also great. I am impressed with anyone who can get up in front of an audience and perform. That being said, if I were to rank talent it would go like this, from worst to best, four being the worst, one being the best.
4 Nickelback
3 Static
2 A group of 7 year old children
1 Adults
Listen kid, you're no Robert DeNiro. But you may be a Chris Makepeace.
Not the actual show but what I imagine it would be like if it were good.
I think I was disowned. Or maybe it was not personal and I merely lost claim to my possessions after fifteen years of storage. Here, let me tell you what happened. I went to visit my parents this week. They are nice people. You would like them. My parents are alone in a large house and the stairs are getting more and more of a challenge for them. They have been talking about moving out of my childhood homestead for a few years.
Think about it. Moving after living in the same place for 47 years is a huge challenge. Heck, moving is a challenge in itself. I was in my last place for four years and it took a couple months to pack everything up. It took me a year to unpack.
47 years of accumulated stuff. Forget about packing, the clean-up is an enormous task. But, my parents finally took the plunge and started the clean-up. They started with my stuff.
In a big box labelled as garbage lay not an inconsiderable amount of my childhood memories. Toys, games, books.
Phil and Tony Esposito Action Hockey Game
A little musty, a little dusty, but it's my stuff. It took me a of couple hours to go through my garbage. But, it has been saved.
Now they didn't say, there is Ohara's stuff, let's throw it out. It was more like, see that dusty stuff, let's throw it out without looking at what's inside.
Amazingly enough, they have tons of their own things to go through. I don't think they know what is in the bottom of their hall closet. Or pantry. Or pockets.
How does this work? Do I lose claim to my possessions after a number of years? I suppose squatter's right won't apply as we aren't talking about land or a building. What is the statute of limitations for claiming your belongings from your parents? I am trying to remember from my studies how this applies but I do not believe this was ever addressed in any Law and Order episode.
Am I supposed to be notified by the Department of Unclaimed Properties and Effects (D.U.P.E)?
As I mentioned my parents are nice people. You would like them. Mostly because they didn't try to throw out your stuff.
