My Friend Andy Had Sex

My friend Andy had sex. He did not tell me he had sex. He does not brag about having sex anymore. He told me that his wife is pregnant. She is due to give birth in December. I immediately started counting back nine months. Andy and his wife had sex in March.

My friend Pete told me that his wife is due in September. I congratulated him and pointed out that he had sex in December.

I do not think about them having sex. I do not picture them having sex. I know they had sex. Now, it is possible, and for their sakes likely, that this was not the only time they had sex. But I have no evidence of this aside from the claim of pregnancy. Therefore, and as far as I know, they had sex once.

None of my friends have ever come up to me and said, 'Hey, Ohara. My wife and I had sex quite frequently in the month of February and on one of those occasions I impregnated her."

No. They would simply say, "My wife is due in November."

Here is a little game. 
1- Write down your date of birth. 
2- Figure out how old you are. (The current year minus the date you were born.) 
3- Subtract nine months from that. 
4- The result? That is the approximate date your parents had sex.

I'm one of the last of my friends that is single, and looking. I do not have any children yet. I date. I have sex. But unlike in our teens I do not compare notes with the guys. I don't say to my friends, "I cooked a romantic dinner for her and we shared a bottle of wine. We had sex. It was fun. You should have been there."

At this point in our lives we do not advise our friends when we had sex. It's happened frequently enough over the last number of years that it isn't a surprise, and it is assumed. Something that we take for granted.

So my point perhaps, is just this. Let us no longer take it for granted.

So, the next time your friend, sister, mother or coworker tells you that they are pregnant, it is correct to respond in an accusatory tone, "You had sex."

From left to right:
 baby, stork.