According to the fake Guinness Book of World Records, the worst Christmas ever occurred on December 25th, 1987 to one Jerome P. Hood of 325 Devonshire Circle, in Andover. The second worst Christmas ever happened in 1952 to Miss Elizabeth Link, of 321 Brayshaw, in Crossfield Town.
For Hood it started with a silly assumption on his part. He assumed he was married and had children. Alas, it was not his wife, and it was not his children who he visited, gifted and kissed on that cold and lonely Noel. Luckily, with no prior convictions, Mr. Hood got off with time served, and a fine.
As for Miss Link, that winter of 1952 started off as any other winter would. Spending and shopping and baking and visiting. On the day prior to the Yuletide, Miss Link made her way to her favourite shopping place at Endicott's. Unfortunately for her, she forgot to put on any clothes. As such were the times, to spare her any embarrassment, no one spake a word.
It was only upon arriving at her little apartment in Brayshaw, was Miss Link made aware of her exposed skin, as she stepped in front of the mirror to adjust her not present belt.
Those were the worst Christmases on record.
Mike and Nicky over at We Work for Cheese haveforced invited us to participate in this 30 Day Creative Writing Challenge. Today is Day 25, the theme is Worst Christmas Ever.
For Hood it started with a silly assumption on his part. He assumed he was married and had children. Alas, it was not his wife, and it was not his children who he visited, gifted and kissed on that cold and lonely Noel. Luckily, with no prior convictions, Mr. Hood got off with time served, and a fine.
As for Miss Link, that winter of 1952 started off as any other winter would. Spending and shopping and baking and visiting. On the day prior to the Yuletide, Miss Link made her way to her favourite shopping place at Endicott's. Unfortunately for her, she forgot to put on any clothes. As such were the times, to spare her any embarrassment, no one spake a word.
It was only upon arriving at her little apartment in Brayshaw, was Miss Link made aware of her exposed skin, as she stepped in front of the mirror to adjust her not present belt.
Those were the worst Christmases on record.
Mike and Nicky over at We Work for Cheese have
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| Worst Christmas |
Christmas can have a strange effect on some people, obviously.
ReplyDeleteI think, perhaps, they started celebrating Christmas a little too early. Like in July.
ReplyDeleteIt does seem like they were hitting the eggnog a bit too hard.
ReplyDeleteSounds like they might be ...idontknow... stark raving mad?
ReplyDeleteMight've felt like a good Christmas to them!
Some might call those the best Christmases ever! :D
ReplyDeleteI'm laughing at P.J.'s comment. To be able to reach that level of inebriation is a remarkable achievement.
ReplyDeleteUmmm, wait a minute. I wasn't supposed to spend my Christmas nude last year?
ReplyDelete