It's St. Patty's Day, so it must be U2

I'm posting this at 11:15 p.m. on Saturday March 17, so technically it's still St. Patrick's Day. Therefore, it seems only right to me to posit my personal Top 10 Best U2 songs on this, the Irish day of green beer and hangovers.

So, without further ado (and because I have always had an unhealthy man-crush/music hard-on for Bono, The Edge, Adam Clayton and Larry Mullen Jr.) here's my "desert island" list. What do you think and what would you, if you are a U2 fan, have chosen?

U2: Bono, The Edge, Adam Clayton and Larry Mullen Jr 

10: I Will Follow (Live at Red Rocks) - Is there a better raw anthemic rock song from the 80s?
9: Ultra Violet (light my way) - Probably the most overlooked U2 song in my opinion.
8: All I Want is You - Rattle and Hum wasn't great, but this song sure was.
7: Walk On - Nice "comeback" album. Nicer song.
6: Stay (Faraway, So Close) - Hated the album. Way too weird. But man, this song. The passion!
5: Please - Pop was a mixed bag, some cool shit, some throwaways. But "Please" is a triumph.
4: Love is Blindness - Listen to any live version of this from the Zoo TV tour and tell me you don't get chills.
3: One Tree Hill/Exit - Most underrated song on The Joshua Tree. (And yes, "Exit" was supposed to be a part of "One Tree Hill", so it counts as one song in my book.)
2: Bad - Could've been my number 1 pick, but for the sheer overpowering awesomeness of...
1: Where the Streets Have No Name - An incredible opening track to the best fucking atmospheric rock album ever made. Here endeth the lesson.

Honourable mention:

- The rest of The Joshua Tree.

I Will Follow (Live at Red Rocks) 

About Schwartz's...

Montreal's Schwartz's

Let me tell you the dirty little secret about that venerated Montreal smoked meat institution, now owned in part by Céline Dion and Rene Angélil, that you might not like to hear: It's NOT the only iconic smoked meat game in town.

In fact, it may not even be the best smoked meat in town. Wha'!? "Blasphemy" you say? Listen, I grew up dans la belle ville. Spent 33 years there and had many a Schwartz's sandwich (medium, double mustard, fries and the mandatory cherry cola). And yes, it's delicious. No argument there. And yes, it's a part of the history of the city, Montreal Jewish history and now every Montrealer's history. It's a landmark. A foodie and tourist mecca. One of those places that puts Montreal on the gastronomic map. Yeah, yeah. I know. I agree. But hear me out.

People, there is an alternative to the now insanely popular and line-up encumbered Schwartz's; A more accessible, authentic Montreal smoked meat source exists mere metres away across the street! It's called The Main. And here's the dirty little secret that Schwartz's and their reputation-makers don't want you to know: The Main is every bit as good as Schwartz's. Yes. There. I said it. Damn straight.

The Main, Montreal's other smoked meat

My father taught me and my sister this (my mom hates smoked meat, so she abstained from the delicious viande fumée excursions my dad planned) while we were but wee kiddies. It was an invaluable lesson. Now, whenever I'm back in Montreal, I'll make a point of getting out to St. Laurent Street and popping by the Main. Sure, I'll sneak a quick peek at Schwartz's on the off chance there's no line, and if there isn't, I'll flip a coin and head to one or the other.

But let me tell you, for my money (and time) The Main is the shit. It delivers on quality, service and the decor is every bit as old, musty and atmospheric as Schwartz's. The only difference is, at The Main, you actually have breathing room and booths to eat at.

Again, I'm not disparaging the Schwartz's experience. Everyone should have it. But from my veteran Montrealer's perspective, The Main's sandwich is delectable and its relaxed atmosphere and perpetual non-trendiness makes it my choice for smoked meat in Quebec. Everyone should also experience The Main.

That being said, I fucking hope Céline and her entourage don't get it into their heads to franchise Schwartz's into some Nickels-type monstrosity. Leave Schwartz's alone! You hear me Angélil?! You purchased a living piece of Montreal history. Don't fuck it up. Just enjoy your lifetime of free smoked meat sandwiches and your V.I.P. stools and let the place continue to bring joy to taste buds around town. And for God's sake, don't try and muscle out your competition across the street. You can exist in harmony with The Main like Schwartz's has for decades.

God, I'm hungry now.

Idiot Drivers. Yes. You.

Some people piss me off. This time it's the drivers that are so fucking lazy they put lives at risk. Those fucktards who cannot be bothered to clear the snow or ice off their car. Yes, you, who just scrapes a 5"x5' hole to see out the windshield. Do you know, you lazy bastard, the snow flying off the roof of your car lands on the windshield of other cars?

If you are reading this and you see yourself, then smarten the fuck up. I saw someone just like you come close to killing someone last week. I waited until today to write this so I would calm down. Yes. This is me calmer.

A pile of snow from your stupid SUV/ mini van/ car/ truck flew off your roof and landed on someone's windshield. This lady's car swerved and spun out and luckily slid onto the paved shoulder. Luckily her baby was in a solid, secured seat and did not know what happened.
The driver? Not so lucky. She had a bloodied temple when she cracked her head on the driver side window. Yeah, she walked away. Yes. You are lucky.

Hey! How would you feel if you caused someone's death?

Remember this one? If I push you, you fall and get up and walk away, nothing happens. If I push you, you fall, crack your head and die, I go to jail. So, if you don't care about killing someone, think about getting buggered in prison.

Quit taking chances with other people's lives you @#^$!.

Bad Drivers

I Missed

My brain is tired and lately all that I seem to come up with are toilet stories and well, toilet humour. Nobody likes layoffs but it seems the last round of cuts included the guy who was crapping on the toilet seats. But the recent transfers to our building there's a new guy who shits up the inside the bowl. In the non shitting area!

I can't understand how you miss if you are sitting. Reminds me of that hilarious and infamous scene from the Eddy Murphy movie Daddy Day Care. "I missed."